Dear Bertha,
I'm reading more and dusting less. I'm sitting in the yard and admiring
the view without fussing about the weeds in the garden. I'm spending
more time with my family and friends and less time working. Whenever
possible, life should be a pattern of experiences to savor, not to
endure. I'm trying to recognize these moments now and cherish them.
I'm not "saving" anything; we use our good china and crystal for every
special event such as losing a pound, getting the sink unstopped, or the
first Amaryllis blossom. I wear my good blazer to the market. My theory
is if I look prosperous, I can shell out $28.49 for one small bag of
groceries. I'm not saving my good perfume for special parties, but
wearing it for clerks in the hardware store and tellers at the bank.
Someday" and "one of these days" are losing their grip on my vocabulary.
If it's worth seeing or hearing or doing, I want to see and hear and do
it now.
I'm not sure what others would've done had they known they wouldn't be
here for the tomorrow that we all take for granted. I think they would
have called family members and a few close friends. They might have
called a few former friends to apologize and mend fences for past
squabbles. I like to think they would have gone out for a Chinese dinner
or for whatever their favorite food was. I'm guessing; I'll never
know.
It's those little things left undone that would make me angry if I knew
my hours were limited. Angry because I hadn't written certain letters
that I intended to write one of these days. Angry and sorry that I
didn't tell my husband and parents often enough how much I truly love
them. I'm trying very hard not to put off, hold back, or save anything
that would add laughter and luster to our lives. And every morning when
I open my eyes, tell myself that it is special. Every day, every
minute, every breath truly is a gift from God.
I don't believe in Miracles. I rely on them. Life may not be the party
we hoped for, but while we are here we might as well dance.
