Laugh Lines, Love Lines

The Prodigal  

Kate: So they...so they die then.
Angel: Yeah.
Kate: Sorry, I guess I'm still having a little trouble with this "otherworldy" stuff.
Angel: Right...although demon's aren't technically otherworldly. I mean, in fact, they were here...first.

Kate: Should I call the coroner or hazardous materials?

Kate: No, you don't get to do that.
Angel: What?
Kate: Kill a demon in front of me and then act like we're gonna have a cappuccino together. It doesn't work that way.

Kate: No offense. I think you're probably a pretty decent guy for a...you know, what you are. But let's keep this strictly business.

Darla: He's magnificent.
Barmaid: Oh, yeah, God's gift alright.
Darla: Really? I've never known God to be so generous.
Barmaid: Oh, his lies sound pretty when the stars are out. But he forgets every promise he's made when the sun comes up again.
Darla: That wouldn't really be a problem for me, actually.

Cordelia: The installation guy said it should be something easy to remember, like...my birthday.
Angel: I don't know your birthday.
Cordelia: Yeah, tell me something you don't know that I don't know. But after 11 1/2 months of punching it in to this, you won't have any excuses.

Angel: This thing was a fighter.
Wesley: Not if it was a Kwahini, it wasn't. At least, not a fighter by nature. They're incredibly articulate, gentle creatures. Not even capable of the kind of power and strength you described.
Cordelia: Maybe it was just having a bad skanky rag day.

Angel: It's about that demon from this morning...
Kate: If you insist on talking about this stuff, could you please not say that word? It makes me... It makes me, I don't know, just uncomfortable. Just say...Evil Thing, okay?

Angel: It's just that the...uh...Evil Thing -- turns out that it wasn't an evil Thing.
Kate: The Evil Thing wasn't an evil Thing?
Angel: Well, it was an Evil Thing, in terms of that word. It just wasn't an evil Evil Thing.
Kate: There are not-evil Evil Things?
Angel: Well, yeah.

Angel: I think that the demon...I think the train may have been targeted for a reason.
Kate: An Evil Thing needs a reason?

Kate: Angel, there's nothing here. Your not evil Evil Thing was just evil, okay?

Angel: I don't know. Ever since she ran me through with a two by four, things have been different.

Wesley: I think you'll find most people require some period of adjustment when confronted with the dark forces which surround us. Women in particular...
Cordelia: Found it!
Wesley: ...struggle with it.

Cordelia: Move your entrails.

Angel: So, you're back.
Cordelia: Very good, Mister I-can't-tail-the-suspect-during-the-day-because-I'll-burst-into-flames Private Eye.

Cordelia: First off, I hate following detail.
Wesley: The voyeuristic aspect is rather unseemly.
Cordelia: Oh! Can I mention traffic? And parking? Or the complete lack of it?
Angel: Not like in the movies, is it?

Angel: I could feel them above me. As I slept in the earth. Heartbeats. The blood coursing through their veins. Was it a dream?
Darla: A dream for you. Soon -- their nightmare.

Angel: This is strictly recon. I need to know exactly what we're dealing with before we make any moves.
Wesley: Right you are. Deliberate, cautious approach would be the most sensible plan. Fools rush in.
Cordelia: No, he wants you to stay here.

Angel: Strange. Somehow, you seemed taller when I was alive.

Vampire: Looks like you're not welcome here, bro.
Angel: He dies, and the very instant his soul leaves his body, I'm through this door, and I kill you both.

Wesley: What happened to calmly, cautiously, and deliberately investigating before rushing in?
Angel: That was Plan A. We've since moved on to Plan B.
Wesley: And Plan B is?
Angel: Do I really have to explain it to you, Wesley?

Demon: You don't understand what stands before you!
Angel: Oh...a big ugly drug-running demon who thinks he's a lot scarier than really he is, maybe? Yeah, she knows.

Demon: You're dead!
Angel: I'm already dead. Welcome to the club.

Angel: Never trust an evil Evil Thing.

Darla: Your victory over him took but moments.
Angel: Yes.
Darla: But his defeat of you will last lifetimes.
Angel: What are you talking about? He can't defeat me now.
Darla: Nor can he ever approve of you. In this world or any other. What we once were informs all that we have become. The same love will infect our hearts, even if they no longer beat. Simple death won't change that.
Angel: Love. Is this the work of love?
Darla: Darling boy. So young. Still so very young.

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