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 Laugh Lines, Love Lines

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date  

Buffy: See, this is a school, and we have students, and they check out books, and then they learn things.
Giles: I was beginning to suspect that was a myth.

Willow: Wow! He hardly talks to anyone. He's solitary, mysterious... He can brood for forty minutes straight, I've clocked him.

Owen: Who's all going?
Cordelia: Well, um, I'm gonna be there.
Owen: Who else?
Cordelia: You mean besides me?

Giles: Alright, I-I'll just jump in my time machine, go back to the twelfth century and ask the vampires to postpone their ancient prophecy for a few days while you take in dinner and a show.
Buffy: Okay, at this point you're abusing sarcasm.

Giles: Well, you know what they say. 90% of the vampire slaying game is, is waiting.
Buffy: You couldn't have told me that 90% ago?

Giles: If your identity as the Slayer is revealed it could put you and all those around you in grave danger.
Buffy: Well, in that case I won't wear my button that says, 'I'm the Slayer, ask me how!'

Buffy: If the apocalypse comes, beep me.

Cordelia: Ooo! Hello, salty goodness! Pick up the phone, call 911. That boy is gonna need some serious oxygen after I'm through with him.

Angel: You're here on a date?
Buffy: Yes! Why is it such a shock to everyone?

Giles: Uh, two more of the brethren came in here. They came after me. But I was more than a match for them.
Buffy: Meaning?
Giles: I hid.

Giles: Buffy, when I said you could slay vampires and have a social life, I didn't mean at the same time.

Buffy: You killed my date!


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