Laugh Lines, Love Lines

First Date  

Spike: Anya said you were The First. Said you were evil. You're supposed to be all, y'know, go-through-able!

Wood: What are you doing tonight?
Buffy: Preparing for tomorrow's counseling sessions.
Wood: No, really.
Buffy: Watching a reality show about a millionaire.

Buffy: It's not even that his behavior's that suspicious. But there he is, right over the Hellmouth all day every day. It's gotta be like being showered with evil, only from underneath.
Willow: Not really a shower.
Buffy: A bidet, then. A bidet of evil.

Xander: Also, like, ten years older than you, right?
Willow: Which makes him, like a hundred years younger than your "type."
Buffy: Yay, someone who doesn't remember the industrial revolution.

Jonathan/First: Really? Why? So you can earn a spot on her little pep squad? You think she'll ever let you in? You're a murderer.
Andrew: Confidentially, a lot of her people are murderers. Anya and Willow and Spike...

Spike: You tried to record the ultimate evil? Why? In a complex effort to royally piss it off?

Xander: What do you think happened? Another demon woman was attracted to me! But I've got the answer! Willow! Gay me up! C'mon! Let's gay!
Willow: What?
Xander: You heard me. Tell me what to do. I'm mentally undressing Scott Bakula, that's a start, right?

Xander: C'mon Willow, let's get this gay show on the gay road. Help me out here!
Buffy: What if you just start attracting male demons?
Dawn: Clem always liked you.

Quotes Index  

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