Laugh Lines, Love Lines


Buffy: Sorry, honey.
Angel: That's okay.

Buffy: Do you get the feeling that we're kind of in a rut?
Angel: Rut?
Buffy: You never take me anyplace new.
Angel: What about that fire-demon nest in the cave by the beach? Thought that was a nice change of pace.
Buffy: So this is our future? I mean, this is how we're gonna spend our nights when I'm 50 and you're... the same age you are now?
Angel: Let's just get you to 50.
Buffy: Liking that plan.

Buffy: I just can't decide on a school right now. I mean... I want to sleep on it, you know, mull it over. Raise 'em up my inner flagpole, see which one I salute.

Snyder: Okay, what's in the bag?
Student: My lunch.
Snyder: Is that the new drug lingo?
Student: No, it's my lunch.
Snyder: Sit up straight.

Buffy: Faith's turn to the dark side of the Force pretty much put the proverbial kibosh on any away plans for me.

Buffy: You, I can't believe you got into Oxford.
Willow: It's pretty exciting.
Oz: That's some deep academia there.
Buffy: There's where they make Gileses.
Willow: I know. I can learn and have scones.

Xander: Kerouac. He's my teacher. The open road, my school.
Buffy: Making the open dumpster your cafeteria?
Xander: Go ahead, mock me.
Oz: I think she just did.
Xander: We bohemian, anti-establishment types have always been persecuted.
Oz: Well, sure, you're all so weird.

Xander: I can't help it. It's my nature.
Willow: Maybe you need a better nature.

Wesley: I don't understand.
Buffy: Well, I don't think I can talk any slower, Wes.

Wesley: But you're a Slayer.
Buffy: Yeah, I'm also a person. You can't just define me by my Slayerness. That's... something-ism.

Wesley: All right, everyone. Monsters, demons, world in peril?
Buffy: I'll betcha they have all that stuff in Illinois.

Wesley: You cannot leave Sunnydale! With the power invested in me by the Council, I forbid it.
Giles: Oh, yes, that should settle it.

Faith: What are you, the narrator?

Buffy: Unfortunately, that's all I could get out of my informant before his aggressive tendencies forced me to introduce him to Mr. Pointy.

Willow: Hey, I eat danger for breakfast.
Xander: But, oddly enough, she panics in the face of breakfast foods.

Xander: I need a volunteer to hit Wesley.

Wesley: This is the town's best hope of survival. It's your chance to get out.
Buffy: You think I care about that? Are you made of human parts?

Vampire: What are you doing?
Willow: I'm looking for a sucking candy. 'Cause my mouth gets dry when I'm nervous, or held prisoner against my will. And suddenly I'm thinking "sucking" isn't a good word to use around vampires. Hey! Did you get permission to eat the hostage? I don't think so.

Faith: You hurt me, I hurt you. I'm just a little more efficient.
Willow: Oh, and here I just thought you didn't have a comeback.

Mayor Wilkins: She's pretty, Angel. A little skinny. Still don't understand why it couldn't work out with you and my Faith. I guess you kinda just have strange tastes in women.
Angel: Yeah, well, what can I say? I like 'em sane.

Snyder: You... all of you... Why couldn't you be dealing drugs like normal people?

Willow: So Faith was like, "I'm gonna beat you up," and I'm all, "I'm not afraid of you." And then she had the knife, which was less fun.

Buffy: This is your night for suave, Will. You should get captured more often.

Willow: What do you mean, I can't?
Buffy: I won't let you.
Willow: Of the two people here, which is the boss of me?

Buffy: I feel the need for more sugar than the human body can handle.
Willow: Mochas?
Buffy: Yes, please.

Buffy: I don't know what the Mayor was talking about. How could he know anything about us?
Angel: Well, he's evil.
Buffy: Big time. He doesn't even know what a lasting relationship is. Probably the only lasting relationship he's ever had was... with...evil.
Angel: Yeah.
Buffy: Stupid evil guy. We'll be okay.
Angel: We will.

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