Laugh Lines, Love Lines


Angel: Oh, whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Dirty people! Not touching the baby!
Cordelia: But pig-drinking bloodsuckers are okay? I meant that in a nice way.

Fred: Didja make a wish?
Cordelia: Sure did. But I'm guessing John Cusack's a little busy.

Angel: I... got you a little something, too.
Cordelia: Angel. You didn't have to do that. You've got enought to take care of as it is.
Angel: I'm a champion. We do important stuff.

Angel: Don't say "last". She'll come out of this. She has to.
Cordelia: And she will! For the last time, I'm fine. I may be having a little separation anxiety what with the leaving-my-body and all, but I'm not dying.

Gunn: C'mon you telling me you never hid anything in your underwear drawer?
Fred: I don't know. I mean for five years I didn't even have... Can we not talk about my underwear please?

Cordelia: You're furious? I get bodyjacked on my birthday and you're the one that's furious?

Angel: I had this dream that, uh...that Cordy was here. She was trying to tell me something--something really important.
Cordelia: Yes! And, and...?
Angel: ...It's weird.
Cordelia: How are you a champion? In what way are you a champion?

Skip: Kidding, I'm Skip. Sorry it took me so long, I... This you? Most people go astral, their spiritual shapes tend to be an idealized version of themselves--you know, straighten the nose, lose the gray... It's sort of a self-esteem kind of thing. You're pretty confident, aren't ya?

Fred: Lorne, what happened?
Lorne: I can't really talk about it.
Gunn: Then how we supposed to find them so we can kick their asses?

Cordelia: You've seen The Matrix?
Skip: Loved that flick. When Trinity's all 'Dodge this!' and the agent goes and crumples to the...and I'm not really instilling any awe any more, am I?

Skip: Yep. That's where it happened: the big cosmic "whoops". Doyle was never meant to give you those visions.
Cordelia: Then why did The Powers let him?
Skip: Well, usually they're pretty good at catching that sorta thing, but... what They didn't count on were his feelings for you.

Angel: I'm more afraid of her dying than she is? What is that?
Voices: Love.

Cordelia: So you kill things now? 'Cause last time I saw you, you just sorta... fainted in front of 'em.

Cordelia: So, let me get this straight: Angel gets the visions of people who are gonna die, and he tells you and you go out and slay and...this is how you make your living? This has got to be the suckiest job in the world.

Skip: We've been over this. I respect what you're trying to do. It's noble and heroic and all that other Russell Crowe Gladiator crap.
Cordelia: You've seen...?
Skip: Didn't love it. The fact remains that humans are not strong enough to harbor the visions... Period! Even the Powers That Be can't change that.
Cordelia: Then find a loophole, Skip. I know my purpose in this world and it includes the visions. And if the Powers That Be aren't complete dumbasses they know it too.

Cordelia: So? Demonize me already.
Skip: It was an honor being your guide, Cordelia Chase.

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